Sunday, May 16, 2010


I spent most of the night with notebooks sprawled out before me, sticky notes organized and scribbled all over, ideas jumping at every move! I am excited beyond means. I have spent most of this night writing!

You are probably wondering why I am so excited about writing. How can something so ordinary make a women of my age excited and happy? Well, writing is never simple nor ordinary and to me it means everything. However, I have suffered from about a 10 year writer's block. I have wrote little things here and there but nothing to shake a stick at. I'm talking about when the words overtake you, consume you, and you must put them into sentences before you go crazy. I'm talking about waking in the middle of the night, grabbing your notebook and pen that you keep at you bedside only to write some jumbling thought down. This was my life.

The last time I really remember being consumed by my own words, I was 18 years old. Ah, it feels like an eternity ago! Has it really been 10 years and only 10 years? It feels like a lifetime to me. I can't remember the last time I had the urge to write something. It became like a chore. A horrible punishment I couldn't get out of. How did this happen? What causes this kind of block? What makes someone cease with their passion to do absolutely nothing else!

Remembering back to that girl of 18 years, I wonder what was going through her mind because it had to be better than what is running through my present mind. Why? Because her mind was full of thoughts and these thoughts she put into poems, stories, journals; with hope and drive for the future.

Now I sit on my bed covered in paper feeling that old urge...that old familiar feeling that I love so. Again, I have thoughts and these thoughts are being recorded into stories, poems, journals and maybe again I will have a goal and drive for the future.

Sleep is now consuming me causing me to fight but my body is tired. Would it be sad if I slept with my notebooks?


-side note- don't eat Taco Bell as a late night snack. It will always be a bad idea.

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