Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Tip Toe

Tip Toe
I go
To see my sleeping self
Climbing in that bed
To sleep with the girl,
Hearing them outside
Clawing at my window
Tearing at my soul.

Tip toe
I go
To shut them out
Leaving them in the dark
Ignoring their screams
Their scratches on the glass,
Trying to scar us with their mark.

Tip toe
I go
To cover my sleeping self
protecting her
From a continuing wrath,
Slaying the shadows
For them to never touch or stir
This little girl.

Tip toe
I go
To lay over my sleeping self
Straining to keep them away
Always fighting in the night
For my little girl to sleep
And be free
In the night.

copyright 2011
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10 comments:

  1. signed...bkmJanuary 4, 2011 at 9:51 PM

    i take it that the little girl is your inner child...a beautiful write on protecting her from the night...that is a must...bkm

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  2. AnonymousJanuary 5, 2011 at 6:15 AM

    The repetitive 'tip toe' is powerful in it's quiet silence. You beautifully contrast the hope for peaceful sleep with the reality of the

    Clawing at my window
    Tearing at my soul.

    Thanks for a contempletive work that makes me want to feel you are at last protected...

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  3. AnonymousJanuary 6, 2011 at 12:59 AM

    Oh yea baby!! What wouldn't one do to preserve that inner child!! I think everything you did here is totally justified!

    Loved the structure of this poem... very nicely done... and totally effective!!

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  4. Brian MillerJanuary 6, 2011 at 6:14 AM

    oy this is an emotional piece because my thoughts instantly go to abuse, which happens often in the cover of night.

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  5. AnonymousJanuary 6, 2011 at 6:21 AM

    Yeah what Brian said.

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  6. AnonymousJanuary 6, 2011 at 12:03 PM

    Such beauty and emotion! Love it. ♥

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  7. AnonymousJanuary 8, 2011 at 1:03 PM

    'tip toe/I go' to kick off each stanza holds the piece firmly. That repetition is integral to the work. personally would have chosen to discard the caps at the beginning of every line (var following a period, obviously), but just a taste thing, of course. Enjoyed your piece, Laura

    Warm regards

    Luke @ WordSalad

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  8. Steve IsaakJanuary 8, 2011 at 5:51 PM

    Great work, use of repetitive structure/opening stanza line(s).

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  9. SheilaJanuary 23, 2011 at 9:03 PM

    striking, stirring, and terrorizing piece of work here...my heart beat faster and faster with each, tip toe i go...(shivers)

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  10. hiddenautisticSeptember 3, 2013 at 6:16 AM

    amazing! guess I love poetry with rhythm and this one has it perfectly! this is a beautiful portrayal of how love protects and guards. i am very proud of both the brave warrior you and the trusting, innocent you. both are glorious!

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